It's Monday. Do some of us feel like crawling under the covers like our Scottish Fold, Koneko? Darn, I can't make the bed this morning because of him being there. Is that an excuse to not do the work? In this case, no. Neither Randy or I have it in our heart to disturb the sweet little guy. When he gets up later, I'll stop what I'm doing and make the bed.
But excuses, oh yes, I make them. I fight that battle. As Sal Frisella said in the 1st Phorm App Livestream "You do you, I'll do me!" He was talking about getting over fears and doing what needs to be done, even if people think it's weird, like doing air squats in place outside when it's the only safe place around while on a business trip in a big city.
Our excuses all the time have a lot of hidden meaning that reveals much about each of us. We can self sabotage and literally excuse ourselves from a situation.
Why is it so tempting to come up with an excuse?
Why do the old habits keep popping up when we try to change them?
It is easy to think it's just you, or that something is wrong with you, but this is so common a problem. It's the biggest problem I see with working with people in the 1st Phorm Fitness App, and I know the other advisors often see the same thing. It's frustrating for everyone involved, but most of all it hurts you. If I'm coaching you in the App, you may think this is specifically about you, but I assure you that you are not alone.
It's complicated, because the reasons for each person can be a bit unique. Each of us has our own experiences and reasons for why we try to excuse ourselves from being our own best.
Lately, I often use the excuse that I'm in so much pain. One leg is still healing, although it's so much better, and the other leg is getting worse while I await surgery in June. The truth is I'm not dealing well with stress.
The thing is, I can't just say I'm going to do better. I must STEP INTO action that is HARD. It's like the guys in the 1st Phorm Livestream said last Friday, the first time is the hardest, then each step after that gets slightly easier, until finally "you are just doing you!"
I'm doing a few things to get better at it. I'm using the headspace App to help with stress and my favorite things in the App are "The Wake Up" and the Sleepcast's to help me sleep some nights. Today's wake up was "How to Stop Doubting Yourself." Think that might have something to do with the excuses we make? The headspace has an article Why do we make excuses?
I've never been one to do these little meditations before. It seemed kind of silly, but now it's me and I'm liking it.
"I'll do that later." "It's out of my control." "No one told me what to do." "I'm not ready." "I have too much stress." "There aren't enough hours in the day."
Does any of this sound familiar?
I love that Janey Davies, who suffered from a panic disorder for over 30 years, studies, overcame, and writes about "Making Excuses." She knows! You are not alone.
Sal Frisella, the president at 1st Phorm knows this too. That's why he pops in and chats with us in the Livestreams in the 1st Phorm App. He walks this fear and excuses journey with us, and he relates his experiences with us. The title of one of his podcasts is "Embracing Fear and Living Life to the Fullest".
Think Sal might understand fear and excuses too? Think he might have some anxiety about taking care of his people at work, being a good dad, and the struggle to keep his health and not become over weight? Yes, and he talks to us about this all the time.
The struggle is real, for all of us. The best thing we can do is embrace solving some problems right now. Take some action to invest in yourself. I know I say it takes sacrifice a lot, because it does. Isn't that sacrifice really just investing in yourself?
When I see how on top of everything I am with the doctors and all the details I have to manage for my surgeries, it shows me I'm competent. The scheduler I just spoke with at my surgeons office just said "You are the BEST patient ever!" That's because I have a huge sense of urgency about being able to walk again. I want my life back. I know getting older means I'll still have some pain, but it would be nice to not have so much pain as I have right now. So yes, there is the sense of urgency.
Now, I just need to put that same sense of urgency into my meal plans! It's so hard to visualize that this is also what makes us healthy, strong, and controls our body fat level. I've got the calendar of stars inside the forum (with a few gaps in this month) and that this problem needs to solved. I need to put some things in place in order to start handling stress better. It won't happen without my own action.
It will mean my own making time to find other ways to find comfort that does not involve food. It means making sure the "helpful" foods are available at all times, and many of the trigger foods out of the house or locked away.
But more than anything, it means giving meal plans the sense of urgency it deserves and not letting excuses get in the way. There will always be something to get in the way! Always!!! Unless we stop letting the world around us allow those valid excuses to hinder us. Our health does deserve the same urgency we give everyone else! If we don't do it now, we won't be able to give to everyone else and the world that runs us into the ground.
It doesn't matter what others think about your methods. The first time you say no, or do something different to set your boundaries with others it will be hard. After that it will get easier.
Yesterday at the gym it was hard. First of all it was hard to get there! I went swimming at noon, ran errands all day, then got to the gym at 5PM. I was tired. I couldn't have coffee because it was too late in the day. Since I only drive into town a couple days a week to swim and get errands done, that's the only time I can also get to the gym.
Since I'm tired from my swim, I only do the exercises I can't do at home; bench press, Lat pulldown, assisted pull up machine, cable flies, and smith machine military press. I went swimming so no makeup (yes, it's hard for me to go out in public with no makeup!) I wear my sunglasses! They are prescription, so why not wear them in the gym.
It made me feel better! That helped me get in there and get my workout done! It was funny because there was one guy in there with his girlfriend. I think it made him smile when I came in with those glasses and headband, maybe he laughed because what a dork! But whatever, I had fun, I smiled, I laughed, we worked around each other and we bantered in a friendly workout way of those needing various machines.
I knew I was being a dork, but it ended up being fun. Just like Sal said in the Livestream last Thursday "I'll do me! You do you!" In some ways, that's such a dorky thing to say, but it makes me giggle and it helps me know it's okay to be weird and get done what needs to get done for our health. You know? That sense of urgency!
It makes me think of that song "What are you waiting for?" I love that song. I know it's not a favorite rock group for people my age, but they have a few songs I really like for working out and that is one of them.
What are you waiting for? 🎶🎵
Are you waiting for a lighting strike? 🎶
🎵 Don't you want to deal with fear?
What are you waiting for? 🎵🎶
PS If you are in the 1st Phorm App with me, send me a message and let me know what steps you took! If you are not in the App yet, and want to walk this journey with me, join and send me a message and let's do this!