I have found that helping others is often the best therapy when you are having a rough time yourself.
It keeps you busy, it makes you feel better, it gives you companionship, and it gets your mind out of your own troubles and thinking outiside of your own little world.
No one wants to be around mean grumpy selfish people. They gravitate toward a smile. And I have found that we can smile often when we don't feel like it. It just takes practice like anything else. At first it feels fake, and then it becomes real.
Randy always tells me I look pretty when I smile and he loves my smile.
But I can tell you, I have to practice smiling and so many things these days make me want to frown. I'm super ugly when I frown! I really am. I have the capacity to be as ugly and mean as the next person if I let myself. God help me (and He does!) ❤
Years ago, when I started coaching, I felt the onslaught of mean women and experienced it in my work. It was kinda new to me, as I've always worked in mainly male dominated fields most of my life. I kind of had to learn lessons others probably learned as girls. Women can be vicious.
I had a period of time where I helped others literally crying as I typed. I think I had a few years that I just wanted to quit. Why bother with coaching?
But then there was always emails, messages, and back then social media (I'm still on LinkedIn and Strava now, actually I'm making some fun law enforcement friends around the country on there with fitness and I'm enjoying that). I'm also connecting with fellow cyclists and swimmers in the area and around the country on Strava, it's so fun! Anyway, right when I wanted to quit, there was always someone there that needed something.
Here I am 10 years later, still doing it. I've developed the armour against anyone who tries to be snarky with me. Especially with my aging health issues now, I don't have time to get sucked in. Snip snip, out of my life. Moving on. I have goals and college courses and computer certificates to obtain, and I'm gaining a new confidence and a new set of friends, and employers who want to actually compensate me for my time and in fact insist on it.
All those hard experiences made me stronger and set me up for what I'm able to do today. It's true that we are foreged under fire. We also know the true strength of our friends, or lack thereof, when we are all feeling the heat of the fire. And oh yes, are we all not feeling some pressure these days?
I still want to help people, and I'll do it when I can. I'm a volunteer coach. I don't ask for much. I know times are hard for you too. The best thing you can ever do for me is to help others. Practice smiling. Get out of your own self sometimes for your own good. Make some some posts in the Nibbles Fitness Forum here and let others know your struggles and your successes and a little of your story. THAT is what helps others. People still feel alone, more alone than ever, and extremely insecure with all the upheaval in the world today.
Also, if you are in the 1st Phorm App, use your referral link in your dashboard to refer a friend who you know needs help. Don't just blast it out. Only give it to someone you know, who you've had conversations with and who is receptive to help. Send the link only with a message.
It's not too late to join me in the 1st Phorm App and I can probably get you in the Summer Challenge if you get in and take your pictures ASAP! I do have a few connections at the HQ
Or, just find it in yourself to smile when you don't feel like it, like at the clerk at the grocery store. Look at their name tag and say their name when you say hello. Ask how their day is? Are they at the beginning or end of their shift?
Make someone else's day, and get out of your own box, just a little. It will be good for you.